don't be anxious about anything

but cast all your cares upon him...

yesterday was TERRIBLE... i dunno, i had a big case of friendless anxiety. consisted of sitting in sheridan/P&P class in the afternoon (after a really nice morning!!) realizing that no one i knew was around... this grew to realizing that i needed to snap out of it and be friendly because this has to stop!? beating myself up for being a little insecure? aaaaaaand then i went (ran away) to UTM to hang out with various ecfers, because there's ALWAYS someone fun to hang out with in the student centre. nope---no one! so i went book shopping but the one classics text was sold out so i went back to SC and finished writing a letter to someone, sat around, tried to read some stuff like proverbs but it's hard to concentrate when sitting in the SC, also when battling a little bit of spiritual warfare or whatever that was yesterday. battling spiritual warfare is not something to attempt on your own yet near people.
well it got better (not even sarcastically---) went to a class called paul of tarsus, where i KNOW people besides artsies! aaaah it's nice. ...and the class is really exciting too--i've already read a bunch in my text and i like it! and after that the timing was all 'wrong', i decided to stay at school for ecf large group instead of driving for an hour to cambridge for band. didn't want to miss LW, but also didn't want to drive all that way. needed some God time, with music and singing and food, but minus the driving by myself.. PLUS i called A and he didn't answer (too loud to hear the phone!) so i didn't know how long they were planning to practice. it woulda topped off my day had i gotten to sheffield at 9 pm to find practice over...blah.
ecf large group was refreshing...still a little shaky on conversation skills but better...haha...pretty much turned my day around.
and today i met with mari to prep for small group. that was also great---mari i love you! :) oh yeah, first thing i did today was go to the hospital and get a hole cut into my leg----i had a piece of wood stuck in my leg (did i write about this already? i don't remember) anyways, usually if you have foreign stuff in your body it will get itself out eventually. but this one didn't just because... yeah. so, they operated this morning, didn't really find anything in particular, which was frustrating, but now my leg is sore! i have a bunch of stitches, gonna have a nice scar...stupid landscaping, bah. i went to class right afterwards, drove standard (this is my left leg--was planning to take the max but changed my mind, smartie!) ...and parked in erindale park which is at least 15 min walk to my class in the north building! sweet. i'm really tired. now off to d&e's for martinis--might not make it home...haha...
have a good weekend.

PS. i DO have good news--i'm still on the schedule to work for irene! i'm SO not gonna be as broke as i thought. might not make it to europe for a full 5 weeks and then 3-4 after that haha... oh well! i'll live in a box when i get there.