I decided---a while ago already---that for Lent I should think about giving up reading-for-fun. Not because I want to cut out all the fun in my life, but because the reading-for-fun tends to cut out what's important. Like God-time, like focusing on school, like cleaning my room, like getting enough sleep. Like spending time with people, putting beads on string, actually getting some sort of exercise...
So I now have a list of wonderful things to read: Beyond Opinion by Ravi Zaccharias, Celebration of Disciplines by Richard Foster... And now that I'm fasting from reading-for-fun, I'll have time. These are fun in a way, but also devotional/productive/thoughtprovoking/helpful/might change how I feel about my Christian life. Another on this list is geez, a magazine full of 'holy mischief in an age of fast faith.' It's been really interesting so far (I've borrowed the spring 2007 issue) and this might be a subscription I'd consider investing in. It discusses Humanity's Big Issues...on a global scale but also on an individual scale. (Check this out for more information as well...)
I don't know what kind of rules to put down about this fast. Do these fun/not-fun books count as things I should fast from? (I have a week for geez and Richard Foster---if I fast from these I won't get to read them!) And I feel like all of these books will be important in how I'm growing. (Blue Like Jazz style----Gotta reread that one too, when I have time.) Except that these books, especially geez, encourage readers to get up and live life as Christ intended it to be lived---for others. Geez is making me think about where I should be getting involved, but it's leaving my action plan totally up to me...pick up the next book...
So we come back to the reason for my fast: When I read, I read for myself, right? I sit on the couch with some chocolate and some super chill indie music, ignoring the paper that's due in a couple weeks. Ignoring the Print project I haven't had the courage to tackle. Ignoring the fact that I'm journalling about how God's speaking to me through these amazing books but I'm not letting him speak to me directly in his Word...(because I'm not there!)
I'm excited to take the time in the next few weeks to figure out what all of this means for ME. I feel like it might mean more than just promising my first summer paycheque to God...or deciding to go all organic. I might need to make huge decisions that potentially will take me far away for an undetermined amount of time...and I'm not a hero because of this. (although that thought is sadly not far enough away...no farther than I can push it in moments of humility, which are few and far between...) I feel like God's been nudging/prodding/poking/pointing me in certain directions and I've been distracted on the way by the things he's been using to direct me, and by my uncertainty about where this direction is taking me... So really, it would just make sense for me to start reading the Bible more, too.
Can I take a Sabbatical? Would Bible College be similar to a Sabbatical? I'd be in classes, but spending time focusing on...Bible...but I'd be in class, spending time and money learning and prolonging my 'poor busy student' pretense (excuse!), while the actions God's calling me to are waiting for me...the people God's calling me to love are waiting for me...clearly waiting for my action which is as of yet still a vague horizon line.
That's all I know for now. And that I need to spend some more time during LENT focusing on this, and praying. Jesus spent this time bringing himself closer and closer to the ultimate reason for his incarnation. Rick Buck pointed out on January 6th (go learn a little about prayer...you will be surprised!/convicted!/challenged!) that the battle Jesus fought during this time was focused on praying himself into God's plan...the prayer in the garden was where Jesus was able to accept God's difficult call for him, and where he struggled with it and humbled himself to it. Praying is about yielding to God...and is more important and worthy of my all-important time than any book I can read about putting my heart in the right place. And will put me in a place where I can follow God's call with no confusion or hesitation.
Never mind spending time on rules about books that I can or cannot read...maybe I'll go pray now.
7 comments:
wow. go Justine. I hope you find some answers, and this brings you closer to God.
last night after LW practice, I couldn't get to sleep because I was trying to think of something I need to give up for lent...I've already done an internet fast, so that's not a good one. but reading this post makes me think that it has to have something to do with my studies or something. But I don't know what. If anything, it sould be MORE of, than less of that. Maybe it should be no internet or email every day until I have so much studying done...and done well.
thanks for the inspiration this post gave me.
and by the way, I think that those books are good to read, but if you think that you're not getting any closer to God through them, and you're still neglecting the Bible, that might be a good indication that you should give up that kind of fun reading as well. Just a thought!
Hey, thanks for being one of the nudges you spoke of!
God give you strength for your fast!
Love, Ben
Yeah, my family jumped on me for that one too. Geez was a good read, but just got me in a political mindset/excited for individual action and transformation...didn't give me the inspiration for it though.
All things are permissible. but not all are beneficial. Those 'for fun' things need to be taken in moderation. It's not wrong to bury yourself in Fiction, but there always must be a balance between fantasy and reality, and I think that's what you've hit on with your goal for LENT.
Good luck to you (well, good providence, as the Reformed like to say), and anyone else giving something up for LENT.
true.
although it's not just the reformed who don't say 'good luck'
More than likely, but I haven't spent a lot of time outside the reformed circle... and the mainstream evangelicals I've met at school, etc. DO say 'good luck' out of habit.
It's clichely (not a word) labeled 'reformed' if it refers to being overly precise and nitpicky about wording. (I once said "oh my goodness" in front of future MIL, and she was quick to point out that it's GOD'S goodness, not mine...)
nice stine!
i think it's super cool that those fun reads like "geez" are setting you ablaze and creating a passion in you
BUT!
I think that being in the Word is what will BREATHE LIFE into the things you are excited about.
Geeze cant stand alone. Bible can:) Good luck with this goal! I'm pumped for you!
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