haha
my post originally was titled 'wow what a jerk i am' and went on to apologize for the 'bucketload of ventage' that is my previous post. yes it's pretty pathetic and yes i'm very down on myself and yes a lot of what i said in there was true, but this original post was essentially more ventage about me 'trying to find myself' and being frustrated with what i'm finding----
but apparently even my blog itself is sick of hearing me complain, as i hit 'publish' and then 'view blog' and it's not there...haha...joke's on me, eh?
lesson learned: stop being selfish. start looking outward rather than inward----because at the rate i'm going, i'll end up with my teddy bear and my unread blog, everyone else will have just moved on.
easier said than done.
first thing's first though: sorry for ranting against y'all, fellow bloggers: i didn't intend to offend or attack anyone. i really do enjoy reading your blogs! and i'm not mad at you just because i'm in a bad mood, i just have this terrible habit of 'unintentionally' picking on others while i just mean to pick on myself---that was the extreme, and i can only pray that i'll quit doing that altogether...
meanwhile, i kind of found a purpose this morning. a goal is nice to have.
as i was reading the paper, an article jumped out at me (no, really! it jumped!) about the salvation army's lighthouse program in oakville for homeless people. (they really do have homeless people in oakville---you'd never know)
i think i'd like to do that.
buy a house in hamilton and fix it up a bit, establish a homey place for people who need a home.
HOME meaning...i dunno.
maybe i'm just borrowing the idea from homestead christian care: i find attractive the idea of sarah's job giving her an opportunity to make a HUGE difference in someone's life. maybe the difference between choosing suicide or choosing to stay here on this earth because there really is a Reason to keep living...
well, i think this home would have to include clean (cleanliness is next to godliness) and God and good food and...art. (of course) and i'd like to find a way to provide this kind of atmosphere in a 'new and improved' way...just the simple act of caring that someone can provide...
maybe i can connect with streetlight ministries or something...get a church sponsorship (or government money i guess) in order to finance it properly---because i don't think selling a few paintings will do the trick...
i suppose i'd need to take some kind of social services schooling before i can get into all of that? or maybe i just need to start walking the streets and see what's out there and what homeless people are looking for. gotta develop those necessary people skills first...haha...
just watch, that original jerky post will probably show up now...
4 comments:
thanks gus. much appreciated.
I like your passion about this home thing. I could give you a few tips - who knows maybe one day I'll be working with you in your big adventure! But yeah..home is a big place for those who need to get up and on. I should photocopy an article I read bout that..its a huge support to not getting into a cycle of making bad choices and screwing your life a million times. Notice I said "home" not a house... Love ya.
I just read my post and the phrase "I could give you a few tips" sounded kinda uppity..I didn't mean it that way..I was thinking of ideas that I've been brewing since working at HSCC.
thanks, sarah!
no, not uppity at all--i was hoping for some advice. i can't see this home thing happening for a while yet, but i also can't see me doing it alone!! but i was also thinking about things you've said about crisis pregnancy centres and such... it'd be awesome to get something like this happening, eh!? maybe i should change my major while i still can.
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